Book Review: The Charioteer
Oct. 18th, 2020 08:12 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
osprey_archerThe moment you have all been waiting for has arrived! I have finished The Charioteer! And I have MANY SPOILERY THOUGHTS, which I will put behind
I had mixed feelings about many of the characters & pairings, but I'm going to start with the one pairing I did NOT have mixed feelings about, which is Alec/Sandy, I had very strong feelings of "Alec deserves a boyfriend who does not attempt suicide every time Alec talks a bit too long with another boy at a party."
Or in fact, Alec could just dump Sandy without lining up another boyfriend first. Being alone is better than being with someone so jealous that they slit their wrists in the bathroom every time you talk to someone else.
As for the main romantic trifecta of Andrew & Laurie & Ralph, however, I was very torn. I found Andrew more appealing: he's serious and gentle and very kind to Laurie, and there's a tremendous romantic appeal about Andrew & Laurie talking in the forest - a sort of timelessness to it, like they're in a lovely bubble that's drifted away from the world and the war. (Although the war is very much on Andrew's mind, in particular: he's a Quaker who is torn about whether he ought to remain a conscientious objector.)
However, I did also get the strong sense that at least at the moment, this is really the only way their relationship works. When Andrew realizes that his feelings for Laurie have a sexual component, his immediate response is to run away to London, and not just for a day or two, but to get himself permanently transferred there on the theory that he had better just not see Laurie again ever, or at least until he's gotten over him.
Of course Andrew might get over this eventually: he's young, and the world is wide. But he's clearly not boyfriend material right at this moment, and just as clearly Laurie (although he would probably rather die than admit this directly) really wants a boyfriend right now, and whatever else you might say about Ralph Lanyon he is THERE and READY.
There's actually a moment when Laurie complains to himself that Ralph doesn't see Laurie's relationship with Andrew as real because there's no physical component, and I think this is true, but I think this is also to a certain extent true of Laurie himself: if he and Andrew had been making out in the forest, I don't think Laurie would have fallen into Ralph's arms the way he did.
Or maybe it's not so much that Laurie doesn't think it's real as it doesn't fully fulfill his needs, although he wants it to? I think Laurie projects onto Andrew an ideal of sexless love that he finds beautiful and romantic and simpler than dealing with the messiness of physical attraction; Laurie has accepted his homosexuality, more or less, but he's still sort of looking for an escape hatch.
(Also, side note: good God Laurie, put poor Nurse Adrian out of your mind, you know very well you don't love that girl and it would be terribly unkind to take advantage of her crush. I thought he was over it but then there's the point where he thinks he's lost both Andrew and Ralph and he's like, oh, well, I could write to Nurse Adrian and string her along... LAURIE. NO.)
But although Laurie finds this platonic ideal compelling, and wants to find that love perfectly fulfilling, in actual fact he doesn't: thus the fact that he falls into Ralph Lanyon's arms more or less the moment that Ralph spreads them wide. He doesn't love Ralph the way he loves Andrew, but also maybe loving someone as a shining ideal is not the best way to love your romantic partner. The higher the pedestal, the harder the crash.
Actually, Laurie idealizes Ralph, too, but the pedestal is not as high, the ideal is not one of purity, and Ralph is aware of this and a willing participant in it (whereas Andrew seems to be totally oblivious to the fact that Laurie has enshrined him as an ideal of Goodness and Purity). He likes being seen as the omnicompetent lordly prefect who takes care of everything. Laurie's feelings about being the taken-care-of are more mixed, but at the same time, he is not merely putting it up with it, he connives toward it, while only half-admitting to himself that's what he's doing.
Possibly he does just like to be taken care of, but he thinks he shouldn't; or he likes being taken care of, but he doesn't like the fact that Ralph can be so officious about it, like the time that Ralph arranges for Laurie to transfer hospitals without even asking Laurie about it. (There's a bit where Alec, who is Ralph's ex, comments that Ralph "takes too much on himself," and that's really true and key to Ralph's character.)
The officiousness sometimes made me want to kick Ralph: there are times when he appears to be trying to win Laurie through the sheer force of superior organization. He also tells Laurie they'll get a flat together, as if the fact that they slept together once makes this a done thing, without actually asking if Laurie wants to get a flat with him. However, unlike Andrew, he is actually available right now, and he adores Laurie. Laurie is so hungry to love and be loved, of course he finds that hard to resist.
The book ends with Andrew in London, having run away from Laurie/his feelings, and Laurie committing himself to Ralph after stumbling upon Ralph's suicide note (which he was not supposed to see until Ralph was safely dead). I found this... I was going to say unsatisfying, but I think frustrating is probably the better word; in a way it is satisfying. We can see in Laurie's relationship with Andrew that he's got a strong protective streak - part of what he likes about Andrew is that he feels he is protecting him - and in a sense this realization that Ralph is hurt and vulnerable allows Laurie to bring this quality to that relationship, where hitherto the protectiveness has all flowed the other way, from Ralph to Laurie.
But it is also a little unsatisfying, because the extremity of the situation rather forces Laurie's hand: he's not so much making a choice as deciding to enthusiastically embrace a choice that he can't help making. And I do wonder if Ralph is going realize Laurie read that note, and feel that Laurie is with him largely out of pity.
I had mixed feelings about many of the characters & pairings, but I'm going to start with the one pairing I did NOT have mixed feelings about, which is Alec/Sandy, I had very strong feelings of "Alec deserves a boyfriend who does not attempt suicide every time Alec talks a bit too long with another boy at a party."
Or in fact, Alec could just dump Sandy without lining up another boyfriend first. Being alone is better than being with someone so jealous that they slit their wrists in the bathroom every time you talk to someone else.
As for the main romantic trifecta of Andrew & Laurie & Ralph, however, I was very torn. I found Andrew more appealing: he's serious and gentle and very kind to Laurie, and there's a tremendous romantic appeal about Andrew & Laurie talking in the forest - a sort of timelessness to it, like they're in a lovely bubble that's drifted away from the world and the war. (Although the war is very much on Andrew's mind, in particular: he's a Quaker who is torn about whether he ought to remain a conscientious objector.)
However, I did also get the strong sense that at least at the moment, this is really the only way their relationship works. When Andrew realizes that his feelings for Laurie have a sexual component, his immediate response is to run away to London, and not just for a day or two, but to get himself permanently transferred there on the theory that he had better just not see Laurie again ever, or at least until he's gotten over him.
Of course Andrew might get over this eventually: he's young, and the world is wide. But he's clearly not boyfriend material right at this moment, and just as clearly Laurie (although he would probably rather die than admit this directly) really wants a boyfriend right now, and whatever else you might say about Ralph Lanyon he is THERE and READY.
There's actually a moment when Laurie complains to himself that Ralph doesn't see Laurie's relationship with Andrew as real because there's no physical component, and I think this is true, but I think this is also to a certain extent true of Laurie himself: if he and Andrew had been making out in the forest, I don't think Laurie would have fallen into Ralph's arms the way he did.
Or maybe it's not so much that Laurie doesn't think it's real as it doesn't fully fulfill his needs, although he wants it to? I think Laurie projects onto Andrew an ideal of sexless love that he finds beautiful and romantic and simpler than dealing with the messiness of physical attraction; Laurie has accepted his homosexuality, more or less, but he's still sort of looking for an escape hatch.
(Also, side note: good God Laurie, put poor Nurse Adrian out of your mind, you know very well you don't love that girl and it would be terribly unkind to take advantage of her crush. I thought he was over it but then there's the point where he thinks he's lost both Andrew and Ralph and he's like, oh, well, I could write to Nurse Adrian and string her along... LAURIE. NO.)
But although Laurie finds this platonic ideal compelling, and wants to find that love perfectly fulfilling, in actual fact he doesn't: thus the fact that he falls into Ralph Lanyon's arms more or less the moment that Ralph spreads them wide. He doesn't love Ralph the way he loves Andrew, but also maybe loving someone as a shining ideal is not the best way to love your romantic partner. The higher the pedestal, the harder the crash.
Actually, Laurie idealizes Ralph, too, but the pedestal is not as high, the ideal is not one of purity, and Ralph is aware of this and a willing participant in it (whereas Andrew seems to be totally oblivious to the fact that Laurie has enshrined him as an ideal of Goodness and Purity). He likes being seen as the omnicompetent lordly prefect who takes care of everything. Laurie's feelings about being the taken-care-of are more mixed, but at the same time, he is not merely putting it up with it, he connives toward it, while only half-admitting to himself that's what he's doing.
Possibly he does just like to be taken care of, but he thinks he shouldn't; or he likes being taken care of, but he doesn't like the fact that Ralph can be so officious about it, like the time that Ralph arranges for Laurie to transfer hospitals without even asking Laurie about it. (There's a bit where Alec, who is Ralph's ex, comments that Ralph "takes too much on himself," and that's really true and key to Ralph's character.)
The officiousness sometimes made me want to kick Ralph: there are times when he appears to be trying to win Laurie through the sheer force of superior organization. He also tells Laurie they'll get a flat together, as if the fact that they slept together once makes this a done thing, without actually asking if Laurie wants to get a flat with him. However, unlike Andrew, he is actually available right now, and he adores Laurie. Laurie is so hungry to love and be loved, of course he finds that hard to resist.
The book ends with Andrew in London, having run away from Laurie/his feelings, and Laurie committing himself to Ralph after stumbling upon Ralph's suicide note (which he was not supposed to see until Ralph was safely dead). I found this... I was going to say unsatisfying, but I think frustrating is probably the better word; in a way it is satisfying. We can see in Laurie's relationship with Andrew that he's got a strong protective streak - part of what he likes about Andrew is that he feels he is protecting him - and in a sense this realization that Ralph is hurt and vulnerable allows Laurie to bring this quality to that relationship, where hitherto the protectiveness has all flowed the other way, from Ralph to Laurie.
But it is also a little unsatisfying, because the extremity of the situation rather forces Laurie's hand: he's not so much making a choice as deciding to enthusiastically embrace a choice that he can't help making. And I do wonder if Ralph is going realize Laurie read that note, and feel that Laurie is with him largely out of pity.
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