osprey_archer: (shoes)
osprey_archer ([personal profile] osprey_archer) wrote2017-07-16 11:00 pm
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Ithaca

I am arrived in Ithaca! The one in New York, not the Greek island, although the Greek island would also be a splendid place to visit someday.

We had a splendid dinner at a restaurant called Rulloff's, which is named after a famous nineteenth century Ithaca murderer (or famous at the time, at least; I had not heard of him until I read his famous last words written up on a chalkboard on the wall in the restaurant), and possessed of excellent food. We had crepes for dessert - or at least, we ordered crepes; I am not sure the chef understood that crepes are in fact supposed to be thinner than ordinary pancakes. However, as the pancakes were topped with raspberry compote and Nutella creamed into mascarpone, of course we forgave them their trespasses and ate them up entire.

***

And I had another thought about Oneida, which I forgot to put in my post yesterday.

Our guide mentioned that over the years in Oneida, the community voted to stop using tobacco, alcohol, and caffeine. Now on the one hand, these are all pretty normal nineteenth-century candidates for reform (the Mormons also banned, and IIRC still ban, all three).

But at the same time, hearing about this reminded me of the Rat Park experiments, which were studies in morphine addiction that took place back in the seventies. Rats in ordinary lab rat cages swiftly get addicted to morphine when they're offered the opportunity to take morphine-laced water. However, Bruce Alexander discovered that rats who lived in a less restricted environment - in a structure he called Rat Park, where they had toys and (more importantly) other rats to play with - barely used the morphine water at all.

And what occurred to me is that, for all its problems - which were after all severe enough to eventually break the community apart - Oneida was basically Human Park. Here you've got all these people hanging out together all the time, even doing a lot of their work in bees (think quilting bee, not spelling bee) so it will be more social and fun, constantly putting on entertainments for each other and playing croquet together and, of course, having lots of sex. Who needs cigarettes or beer or even tea when they've got infinite croquet?

...I mean, you'd still have to pull my tea out of my cold dead hands. But then I'm not living in Oneida, now am I.

***

Although it's also worth noting that living for five years in Oneida failed to dent future presidential assassin Charles Guiteau's delusions of grandeur even slightly, so clearly all the togetherness in the world is not a panacea.
asakiyume: (more than two)

[personal profile] asakiyume 2017-07-17 12:21 pm (UTC)(link)
Even focusing on getting the chance to do some criticizing doesn't help me much. Part of what gets in the way of my telling people things that have upset me is that I start imagining their replies (I know the Oneida folks don't get to talk back, but I imagine the hurt/anger/unjustified self righteousness/misunderstanding I'd see in their eyes), and then my replies to their replies, and then it's playing out in my head like an exhausting mental chess game, and I end up thinking, "Better than talking about this is for me to try to avoid situations that provoke whatever-it-is that bothered me." That's not an optimal response, I know, and it's something I'm trying to change, but that tendency in me keeps me from finding even the getting-to-criticize side of things cathartic. It would only feel cathartic if I could be sure the other person understood, agreed, and was remorseful.
asakiyume: (miroku)

[personal profile] asakiyume 2017-07-17 12:55 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah, that's a good point. And I think even today, it's possible to do it. The model I think works for me is the model of constructive writing critique. When someone reads through my work and says, I didn't understand what was going on here, or, why did the character do this here? I can see the flaws in the story without it feeling like the message is THIS STORY SUUUUUUCKS.